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Ping2 on the RUN =D

I set my goals high! Yes, I fell hard all the time but time and again have shown me that I landed stronger, to climb again! When you know you are going blind, you wake up everyday not to meet others' expectation, but to work hard for what you truly enjoy and believe in. This is my journey

Month

July 2006

I M LAZY!

I really need to salute Cikgu Miss Jane!  We once asked her why didnt you give tuition to students and earn extra money, her reply was very staright and honest, "I m lazy!"  I wonder how many of us can be so frank about our laziness!!  I have been telilng myself to finish my thesis that has been postponed so many months and yet whenever i had time to sit down and start doing it, I end doing some other things!  I m suppose to wash to the car, hehe, guess you know how dirty my car is by now!  I keep telling myself, yet at the back of my mind, I m reminding myself to jog on the treadmill this evening even if it’s for 30 minutes!  I used to be so diciplined waking up at 6 am and jog 5 km 3 times a week, what happened to me??!!!!  I remembered telling drain ling that I lose the discipline to exercise consistantly and he said he is facing the problem and concluded that "We r old already!"  Common let’s just face the truth, We r just plain lazy!  I must jog this evening and after that i MUST wash pink kancil!
 
this is just so nice, when i m hardworking 2 run on the treadmill, fold the cloths and wipe the tables, i m sick now!
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Daddy!

;)) Whenever daddy sits in front of the TV, he ll fall asleep and mummy will start making noise!  Just now dinner, he said all of us must at least once a week eat breakfast outside together, even though we eat breakfast together every morning during weekdays!  He also said the whole family must eat out 2gether and insisted on inviting my bro in law n sis!  Compared to the daddy

why i cannot fly??!!!!!

i m startig to suspect that i actually dont have wing at all, ying ying tipu me said got invinsible wings!

Why do i suddenly i feel like going some other place 2 start a new life?

i dont really care where, even if it is Lundu, i dont mind, some where with beach and sea i guess!

2 comments i get from my friends 2day!

pei shan: not every1 is like u, easily contented and happy
ngee bang: U died for so long

Why i cherish my freedom SO much!

The passed 8 years, whenever i received his sms to help him search sth for his studies, I ll dropped everything i m doing to help him.  I didnt stay up 1 day to help him do his project, I stayed up 1 whole week doing a 2nd year proj that i totally didnt understand at all.  For that case, I was just suppose to help up on a small part but later on he said he is not free and asked me to complete the whole proj.  Ying should had known, it was on a Saturday nit, it was quite late, I rushed over to Ying’s house to take installation CD, that nit i stayed up till 2 i think just to reformat his PC so that he can do his assignments.  I love road trips so much so when Ying, Kiang, Ai Wei and Lee Ing followed Ngee bang back, I didnt follow because it was a Saturday nite and I didnt want him to spend it alone.  I encouraged him to have his own circle of friends but since he dropped out of uni, he felt that is better for him to keep low profile.  I know he always wanted 2 go other places but his mum needs him to be around.  I arranged for him to go Sematan with my friends and I.  All this incident happened only at the end of last year and early this year!  He told me I gave him the best 8 years a few days after his bday and the week after that he was hugging other girl watching cartoon while I had to go out to earn money!  He even admitted that he went out with the girl before this.  He told me he cant work and study at the same time because the pressure is just to big, so i told him is ok, he just concentrates on his study.  I  went out and get myself a job for both of us.  He cant study and work but he has time to cheat on me with another girl.  And guess what, he failed 2 papers for that semester.  The passed 8 years ALL my Saturday nites are spent with him.  Sometimes he ll call to have dinner, I had to cancel my dinner with my family just to accompany him!  I used to showoff that my bf is very understanding letting me go to ballroom dance with my good friend but he is just looking 4 excuse to fool behind my back!  After we broke off, he still have the guts to tell me that he is no one without me and as soon as the semester starts he moved up to be with the girl!  All in the process of recovering, Ai Wei, knowing me well,  she gave me magazines to read about how my immune system will be affected from the breakup, I coughed for 2 months!  Haha, Ai Wei even let me read magazine article about the need to make myself beautiful and countless times, reminding me that is not my fault that the relationship turned this way!  With every1 loving me so much!  I m really happy now!  The relationship had become physically, mentally and financially draining that I m now happy to say!  I m FREE!!!  I can go on road trips, i can travel, i can dance, i can even buy anything i 1 and I dont need to do 3rd or 4th year of TESL assignments and projs!!!!  Hehe, now more time to with my family and friends!  I already told him, I forgive him already and I really do hope he and the girl are happy!    If I want to move on with my life I just need to do this even though the people around me still think I need to take my time.  Really, I m writing this because I really want you guys to know I m really OK already and I had never been happier b4!

Kite

I remember the afternoon we were at the beach, I think it was 2 pm when the sun was scorching hot!  I saw a little angmo girl trying 2 fly a kite, with her daddy, i think.  Her daddy helped her released the kite and she ran and ran.  But she’s so little and the kite just wouldnt fly. Her daddy helped her released the kite again and again but i guess she’s just 2 little and no matter how fast she ran, the kite just wont fly.  At the end her daddy flew the kite by himself and hold for her.  I 1 2 FLY A KITE!!!  Cikgu Miss Jane, when r u going 2 accompany me to fly a kite?!!!
My bro once told me, we r like kites.  When we r release to the "sky", we can "fly" higher and higher, we just fly at certain height depanding on the person or the thing that is guiding or we will never fly at all and sometimes even if we did fly in the early stage but once the string broke, the kite just wonders without any direction.  Everything is a factor, from the kite itself, to the person that release you, to the wind, to the strength of the string, what type of kites are we?  I would very much 1 2 fly and fly but can I? 

some1 stole from some1’s blog tht i find meaningful

Pei Shan said cannot write about other ppl in my blog.

  

Friends matters a great deal to me. Whether it’s just for that temporary moment in your life where you need someone who can share that short journey, or exploring the philosophical depth and sparks of revelations life throws at you, they are the ones who witness your life at that very phase.

 

I agree with this part!  I consider my friends as one of the biggest factor that I moved on so well!  Love u guys!  There’s once in Oprah where they discussed in one of the movie, one of the line in the script is that, we want to find some1 in our life so that they can witness our lives.  At that time i couldnt understand but now i think I know what it means but there is one part that they didnt include, because you love the person that much, not only do you want the person to witness our life but you want to witness the life of that person we love too!

I m happy!

I think since the family trip 2 the beach, I m really happy.  hmm then again it could b since my superise bday party!  it doesnt matter, as long as i m happy!  Yesterday i did an experiment on myself!  hmm..  better not describe it here
But 2day I m an angel!    I can hear every1 boo..ing!!!  Daddy requested for thumb drive last weekend but i was so packed didnt have the time to get for him.  So 2day I came home from work about 5.45 p.m., i rushed over 2 Saberkas to get him a thumb drive and rushed home because he needs to leave for the airport at 6.15.  I know daddy is happy but he just didnt show it, hmm..  mayb bcos he is happy bcos he is giong down kl 2 play! 

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